Biggest Decisions Ever Made

I am the person who often think about random things. This morning, when I was on my way to the office, I was thinking about the biggest decision that I ever made in my entire life.

Yes, I thought about that while riding my bike. In the middle of heavy traffic.

And I came out with a short list of the biggest decision I’ve made so far, here they are:

1. Going to A Junior High School in Jakarta

Since I wasn’t living in Jakarta (and still not), going to a school in Jakarta was a big deal. It wasn’t just a matter of distance, but it was more of striving to get something with a pretty low probability. At that time, students from outside Jakarta only get 5% place of the total number of students accepted in a school. So I did fight for that one chair in the class. 

However, at first my mom didn’t let me do this due to the distance problem (it was around 15km from home), and I was still 12 years old by the time (so she really worried about me getting exhausted). But thanks to my father who convinced her and was really supportive. He was so sure that I can do it all, and I would get a better chance for the next education, and also a broader networking. Aaaaaand it was true! 🙂

Little did I know that this was the first and one of the biggest decision that leads to my long, great journey.

2. Taking an Acceleration Class

Although it was not one of my best decision, but I think it shaped who I am today. You wouldn’t believe me if I tell you that the reason behind it was only a “challenge from a friend”. 

When I was still in JHS, I had some senior year friend who eventually got into the cool Senior High School just next to my JHS 😂. One of them said that the school was soooo cool that it has an acceleration class. I was like WHOA! And the entire school knows that the SHS was indeed really cool that it is one of the top SHS in the whole Jakarta.

My friend then challenged me “let’s see if you can get here and graduate at the same year with me!”

Dude, you don’t challenge a girl in puberty! Hahaha she is definitely going to work her azz off to get it :p So I said “challenge accepted“! *put a meme here*

Aaaaaand I got into that cool SHS, PLUS, I also got that acceleration class! *mission accomplished!*

The one thing I didn’t know was, studying in 2 years instead of 3 was not that good either for your brain or your psychology. My classmates was so competitive, and they study so hard everyday like crazy that I felt left far behind. And later I realize that there must be some reason why they make SHS education 3 years long. There must be!

Nonetheless, if I didn’t take that challenge, I wouldn’t meet my friends now 🙂

3. Going to A University in Bandung

It is somehow similar with number one, only that the condition was reversed. In this one, my father didn’t let me go to Bandung while my mom really encourage me to study there. My dad thought I could just go to a university in Jakarta since I also got accepted there (and it was also a government uni, while the one in Bandung is a private uni). But I was so rebellious at that time, I insisted to go to Bandung.

I had a big fight with my father that he didn’t even support me financially for my education as a form of protest. I desperately seek help from my relatives, and luckily I got it from my uncle.

This maybe the big decision that lead me to my current path of life. It all start here. In Bandung I met a lot of good friends, I met some important people in my life, I fell in love and fell out of love. I also get a lot precious and life-changing experiences. I know how it felt to be so broke that you can only eat two donuts for the whole day, and you have to eat it at the peak of your hunger time. I also know how it felt to stop being broke without asking more money to your parents. Yes, you work. You work your ass of and make money to afford living.

Yet you also realize that socializing and having non-academic achievement is importany for your future. So, you work again. You work voluntarily in an organization. And you get paid with the list of experiences in your CV.

You’re young and free and full of energy. Sleep is not your number one priority for this time. 

I couldn’t imagine how my life would be so much different if I didn’t go to Bandung. Going to Bandung was my leap of faith.

Living in Bandung has taught me so much that I knew I would always love this city for the rest of my life.

4. Offering Help to My Friend as A Substitute Shop Keeper

I remember that Wednesday noon, when my friend asked me to substitute her as a shop keeper in my Campus’ Cooperative. Yes, I joined as a member too in my Campus’ Cooperative, and Wednesday was not my schedule to be a shop keeper.

I just can’t imagine if I decided not to help my friend, then I wouldn’t have met Bang Nando. He’s one of the most influential people in my life. If it was not because of him, I wouldn’t know CCI, I wouldn’t know the friend whom I hang out with now, I wouldn’t have the experiences that I had now. And there’s just so much I wouldn’t know.

Bang Nando was so kind and silly. And I’m so glad to be his friend.


That was the biggest decision that I have made so long that I didn’t know would lead to my destiny, my life journey.

My life is so amazing right now. If I can turn back time, I wouldn’t change a thing. I would live my live the way I live it. There’s just soooo much thing to be grateful for 🙂


Lagu Paling Romantis

Saya termasuk orang yang mudah sekali sentimentil kalau dengar nonton film sedih. Teman saya sampai udah ngerti dan menyediakan tisu kalau saya tiba-tiba nimbrung nonton drama sama dia.

Nggak cuma nonton film. Bahkan kalau dengerin musik pun gitu. Saya bisa sampai nangis kalo memang lagunya deep gitu.

Nah, ada beberapa lagu yang menurut saya romantis banget. Sampai-sampai saya berkaca-kaca atau senyum-senyum sendiri pas dengerin. Baik dari segi lirik maupun nada (atau irama? ya gitu pokoknya), yang jelas buat saya lagu-lagu ini romantis abis. Iya, sampe abis deh pokoknya.

So here are the few of my romantic song:

1. Banda Neira – Sampai Jadi Debu

Selamanya, sampai kita tua. Sampai jadi debu. Kau di liang yang satu, ku di sebelahmu.

Nggak ngerti lagi sama romantisnya lagu ini. Saya sampai berkaca-kaca dengernya.

Lagunya bisa didengarkan disini: Banda Neira – Sampai Jadi Debu

2. Naif – Karena Kamu Cuma Satu

Denganmu semua air mata, menjadi tawa suka ria. Akankah kau selalu ada menemani dalam suka duka?

Sudah suka lagu ini dari awal kuliah. Sampai sekarang pun kalau dengar lagu ini, masih tetap suka.

3. Oasis – Don’t Go Away

So don’t go away, say what you say. Say that you’ll stay, forever and a day.

Bagian lirik yang ini, menurut saya romantis sekali. Bahkan selamanya tak cukup. Masih butuh satu hari lagi.

4. Adhitia Sofyan – Number One

You don’t even have to try, you already my number one.

Sebenarnya banyak sekali lagu-lagu karya Adhitia Sofyan yang saya suka. Tapi kayaknya buat saya lagu ini romantis sekali.

5. Andien – Pulang

Hari ini sayang aku akan pulang, berlabuh di dekap cintamu. Karena pelukmu akan selalu membuat diriku jatuh cinta.

Kalau dengar lagu ini, saya selalu ingat ibu saya. Pernah hidup sebagai mahasiswa rantau membuat saya sering kangen rumah, terutama ibu saya. Jadi setiap di perjalanan pulang saya sering dengar lagu ini, sambil membayangkan memeluk ibu saya.

6. Tulus – Teman Hidup

Di dekatnya aku lebih tenang, bersamanya jalan lebih terang.

Teman hidup memang lagu yang menurut saya legendaris. Lagu yang membawa Tulus bisa sampai seperti sekarang. Memang saya akui, lagunya bagus sekali. Lebih dari sekedar pasangan, namun “teman hidup”.

Lagu-lagu ini tuh ya, entah kenapa, selalu bikin senyum-senyum sendiri kalo didengerin. Selain liriknya yang tidak biasa, nadanya pun selalu berhasil membuat saya seakan pindah dimensi. Pas dengerin tuh pasti langsung “anjrit, duh dalem bener sih” :’)

Sebenarnya masih banyak lagi lagu yang menurut saya romantis banget. Tapi lupa hahaha, nanti deh kalo ingat ditulis lagi.

TALK TO ME : Sebab Saat Depresi, Pikiran Untuk Bunuh Diri Itu Dekat Sekali.

One good thought. It reminds me to not judge people’s feeling. Alhamdulillah.

Catatan Mimi

23 November 2016.

Hari itu kota Bristol dikejutkan dengan berita meninggalnya 3 mahasiswa baru di kampus saya, University of Bristol. Yang lebih mengejutkan, mereka meninggal dengan cara bunuh diri! Memang, fenomena bunuh diri saat study ini tidak dipungkiri banyak terjadi. Bahkan, penelitian yang dilakukan oleh National Union of Students pada Desember 2015 menemukan bahwa 1/3 dari mahasiswa yang menjadi populasi penelitian mengaku pernah berpikir untuk bunuh diri dan 78% diantaranya disebabkan karena mental health problem seperti stress dan depresi. Tahun 2014, data dari Kantor Statistik Nasional Inggris melaporkan ada 130 kasus mahasiswa (fulltime students) bunuh diri di Inggris dan Wales (sumber : Dan baru baru ini saya dikejutkan oleh kabar salah satu mahasiswa Indonesia di Jerman yang akhirnya mengakhiri hidupnya, sebuah berita yang menyesakkan dada di awal tahun 2017 😢

Memang, memulai babak baru sebagai mahasiswa, terutama di luar negeri, dimana sistem pendidikan sangat berbeda dengan yang ada…

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#100DPS Day 100: 2016

It’s finally over.

Both the year of 2016 and my #100DPS project.

2016 has taught me so much, the joy and sorrow. I’m going to list the big thing that happened in 2016.

1. I got accepted in Barcelona for my master degree.

2. I have a breast tumor.

3. I published my first paper, yeay! 

4. I got an exceptional birthday present: an invitation card to spend a full day with one of my favorite person without distraction. Thank you, I will never forget this 🙂

5. I went to another country for the first time.

6. My grandmother died.

7. I can finally live under the same roof with my father again.

8. My friends got married. 3 of my friends got married! One of them even already have a baby, and one another is going to be a father soon!

Well done 2016, you have done so much. Thank you for all the lesson. I hope I’ll be a better version of myself in 2017.


#100DPS Day 99: Paradoks, Pertanyaan dan Jawaban

For the first time, I really understand that love is not about answering the question. And it does not always have the answer.

Aku sering menerka-nerka, apa yang sebenarnya kau rasakan?

Apakah kita berada pada frekuensi yang sama?

Kau si pemalu, kurasa tidak pernah secara blak-blakan mengungkapkan berjuta rahasia dalam kepalamu.

Namun, lebih dari kata, aku mengerti.

Dari dekap hangatmu.



Pandang matamu.

Genggam tanganmu.

Hari itu, kau perlakukan aku bagai seorang putri raja.

Menjagaku, membuatku bahagia.

Aku benar-benar bahagia.

Kau beri aku milikmu yang tak mungkin kau dapat lagi.

Betapa hidup adalah paradoks.

Bagaimana mungkin suatu hari bisa terasa sangat panjang, dan sangat pendek di saat yang sama?

Atau bisakah ia berhenti sejenak?

Aku ingin merasakan setiap detil saat itu.

Rasanya belum cukup. Belum cukup saat itu.
Kamu racun.

Kamu telah menyembuhkanku.

Terima kasih.

For the most memorable October 8th in my life.

#100DPS Day 94: Pertama Kali ke Kwitang, Salah Satu Surga Buku Terpopuler di Jakarta

Beberapa hari yang lalu Kak Mega tiba-tiba nge-line saya. Ngajakin ke Kwitang, out of the blue.

I know what is it about, and I instantly said yes.

Kak Mega adalah orang yang suka sekali baca buku. Sedangkan saya adalah orang yang suka sekali foto-foto. Akibatnya, jika kami pergi ke pasar buku, dua belah pihak terpuaskan. Yang satu dapet stok buku, yang satu dapet stok foto.

Kwitang adalah salah satu pasar buku yang cukup terkenal, terutama buat anak-anak seusia saya (emang masih anak-anak?). Karena pasar buku ini sempat nge-hits di awal tahun 2000-an gara-gara film AADC.

Sayangnya, saya baru kesampean mengunjungi tempat itu sekarang. Lokasinya di daerah pasar Senen. Nggak jauh dari Mall Atrium Senen.

Seharian kami keliling-keliling untuk hunting foto di Kwitang, dan beginilah hasilnya:

Abangnya maen hape mulu
Tenggelam diantara buku
Pegang Tapi Nggak Beli
Kalo lagi jaga warung emang suka ngantuk
Neng seneng amat neng?
“Saya ganteng neng kalo di poto, kalo neng naksir saya ga tanggung ya”
“Neng ikutan poto dong”
“Foto saya mau dimasukin ke majalah ya neng?”
Yo dipilih dipilih
“Bang senyum dong bang biar ganteng”. Dan beginilah senyumnya.
Ini kak Mega.
“Neng jangan poto saya neng ntar kameranya rusak kena pirus”
“Gini ya gayanya?”
Plenty of books.
Shy shy cat(?)
Up & Down
Sekian foto-foto di Kwitangnya. Semoga bisa hunting foto lagi dalam waktu dekat!